On November 5th, I frantically refreshed the polls every 30 minutes for the 2024 Presidential Election. I hoped for a blue wave after seeing the red mirage. I woke up on November 6th to the election results and texts from my friends and little sister. They were scared, disappointed, and inconsolable. Frankly, I was as well. The only thing I could do was text my friends and sister that I was sorry. But I didn’t even really know what I was sorry for; I felt so guilty for not being able to do more with my ballot eight hours ahead of everyone else.  

Then came the posts I see on social media: if we have different political opinions, we can still be friends.  

Maybe this was true back in 2012 with Obama versus Romney, back when Republicans weren’t devout followers of Trumpism (and presidential debates were super boring to watch). And some of the only disagreements that took place were how social services should be funded. 

Post-2016, the political climate has changed. In good conscience, I can’t be friends with people who align themselves with the far-right agenda, who gratify themselves from the satisfaction of ‘triggering the dumb liberal.’  

I’m exhausted from explaining to people that this is personal to me. It always has been and in good conscience, I can’t be friends with people that value the economy over my friends’ and family’s right to live in the United States. And I can’t be friends with people that believe my existence in the UK is somehow replacing ‘true British people.’  

I’m exhausted from explaining to people that virtue signaling as ‘one of the good ones’ is self-serving and deflects them from taking real responsibility. Seriously, what is the ‘blue bracelet movement’ going to do to address the deep-rooted issues of White supremacy? If you want to be known as good, then be good. I’m exhausted from explaining to people that ‘canceling out your partner’s vote’ is performative and it’s also a deflection from taking real responsibility to address White supremacy.  

This isn’t to say my friends and I have the exact same political views, checking every single box along the way. Frankly, we disagree on plenty of sociopolitical issues, and that’s okay. But at our core, we value the same things: humanity, empathy and growth. We do feel anger, but it is anger directed at the institutions and powerful figures that exploit and profit off young men’s anger that push them to align themselves with the far-right agenda.  

So, I am an immigrant. And I am a statistical burden to these people. I am a number before I am a person. They are waiting for me to do irrevocable damage to spread an anti-immigrant agenda. So why would I want to be friends with someone who views me as a numerical burden before I am a person?